should I come clean about an affair?

I’m in the middle of an ugly child
custody and divorce battle. My
husband suspected I was having an
affair, which is true but I’ve
denied it. Should.I just cone
clean or could that hurt my
changes of getting my son?

Asked on April 2, 2016 under Family Law, North Carolina

Answers:

SJZ, Member, New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 4 years ago | Contributor

If it comes out, it may have an impact on custody: not so much from the affair itself, but if 1) in having the affair, you did anything detrimental to/for your child (like missing activities or time with him to have the affair; not being reachable when you were needed); 2) the child was exposed to anything he should not have exposed to, such as in relation to infidelity, sexuality, etc.; and/or 3) if your partner is an unsuitable person to be in your child's life (e.g. any substance abuse issues, criminal record, other children whom he does not provide for or support, etc.). So there are definitely factors here that could come into play, and you are advised to consult  with a divorce or matrimonial law attorney--and if you are the middle of "an ugly child custody and divorce battle" and don't have one, get one *right* away--to examine your situation in detail.


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