If my daughter wants full custody of her girls and wants to limit herhusband asto where he can take them, what can she do?

My daughter’s husband has been cheating on her for months. The woman is older, married and has 3 kids. He has been with this woman off and on for years even before he married my daughter. She wants to leave but doesn’t want him to be able to take her girls with him if he goes to see this woman. I would like for her and I to move out of state to be by her sister and not need his approval. And I would like to know how to put limits on him if they divorce so he can’t take the kids around this other woman? Her husband has lied about the affair many times but this time he left his email.

Asked on November 7, 2011 under Family Law, Wisconsin


M.T.G., Member, New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 9 years ago | Contributor

I can surely understand how, as a other and Grandmother, this must be a heart wrenching situation.  Seeing your own child hurt is a tough position to be in.  But what you need to remember is that the children - THEIR children - can not be made to be pawns in this chess game, so to speak.  And although I am sure that you are well meaning, you can not do anything that will interfere with your son in law's parental rights with regard to his children.  So unless he is doing something that could be seen as harming the children in some way - and I know it feels like it is but unless he REALLY is - then it is highly unlikely that the court will allow you to move out of state unless he agrees or that they will limit his right to have the children around her short of her being a "legally bad" person in an of itself.  Your daughter needs to seek legal help here.  Good luck to her.

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