Getting divorced and we live in 2 different states

I’m trying to get divorced from my current husband. I’ve been living in my state for 1 1/2 years and my husband has been living in another state for a1 year. We have 4 children together and we both have 2 kids each. What’s the process to get a divorce? He is in agreement but only if I pay for it. How would I start the process and what if I file and he doesnt answer? Will they grant me a divorce if he doesn’t answer within a time period?

Asked on May 18, 2016 under Family Law, Virginia


M.D., Member, California and New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 4 years ago | Contributor

First of all, if both of you are legal residents of your respective states, you can sue for divorce in either state. If you want to file in VA, here is a link to a site that I think you will find to be of help: If you want to file in your husband's state of residence, you can either google for for more information or contact an attorney in that state for further information. 

S.L,. Member, California Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 4 years ago | Contributor

You will need to get a packet of forms from the court for a petition for dissolution of marriage.  Complete the packet of forms, file it with the court, have it served on your husband, then file the proof of service  with the court. Have a process server in or near your husband's city serve him.  You can find process servers under attorney services either online or in the Yellow Pages.
If your husband does not respond within the specified time period, you win by default and your divorce will be granted on the terms you requested.

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