Can my father take my brothers and I from my motherif I’m a minor andmy boyfriend comes to live with us?

My boyfriend is a Canadian and is planning on leaving his house at 16. This is legal there and he will be 17 at the time of the move. He wanted to move in with me here in WA but we have run into a problem. My mom’s only fear of him living here is that my father (who is currently separated from her) will try to take away my brothers and I (12, 14, and 16 currently but at the time we plan to do this 13, 15, and 17), She feels that he will use my boyfriend living at my residence as not only an alien but as a minor as grounds to remove us from the home for moral reasons. Can he do this before or after the custody agreements are final? Is this considered immoral in the eyes of the law and would it truly be grounds to remove 3 teenagers from the home that they have chosen to reside most of the time?

Asked on September 21, 2011 under Family Law, Washington


M.T.G., Member, New York Bar / FreeAdvice Contributing Attorney

Answered 9 years ago | Contributor

This is really not an easy question to give guidance on.  If your Father believes that your Mother is acting in such a way as to encourage immoral behaviour between yo and your boyfriend or allowing someone to stay in the house and thereby taking away from the necessities available to you and your siblings (adding another mouth to feed) then your Father can try and attack your Mother morally and try and sway the judge with the issue.  It is not unheard of.  If the Judge will agree with his position really depends on the Judge and the facts.  I would indeed consult with an attorney in your area on the matter.  While they are negotiating the custody agreement slip this in as a topic for discussion with the attorney.  You and your siblings are indeed old enough to be heard by the Judge as to whom you wish to live with.  But it is the Judge who will make the final determination as to what is in your "best inerests."  Good luck.

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