If the order was signed less than 30 days ago - HIRE A LAWYER AND SEEK A NEW TRIAL!  Do this immediately.

 Apparently, this is a common issue, let me explain for everyone who sees.  Once you are served, you have an obligation to answer even if you are working it out.  I hate to point out the obvious, but there are some people who would literally pretend to be working on the marriage all the while simply waiting for an opportunity to take advantage.  The fact you are under the mistaken impression that she will tell you before she stabs you in the back will not save you.