Can my car be insured and tagged in one state and I live in another?

No, this is against the law, although a fair number of people risk getting caught for this.

You have to have your driver's license in the state where you live;  each state gives you a limited amount of time, after you move there, to get your driver's license in that state and to register your cars there.  You can't get a driver's license or tags, from a state where you don't live, without lying under oath (the applications make it clear that they are considered sworn statements).

And you can't get insurance for one state, saying you live there if you don't, without committing fraud, which means that if you have an accident and you're caught out, the insurance company can deny coverage.