can employers offer employ/child insurance to some employees & not others

I know that this seems unfair but it is probably legal.

Most employment relationships are what is known as "at will".  This means that basically the employer can hire or fire someone for any reason or no reason whatsoever, as well has increase/decrease salary/hours, promote/demote, generally impose requirements and, as in your case, give benefits as they see fit.  In turn, you can work for an employer, or not, your choice. 

The only exceptions to the above would be if there is a stated company policy covering this, or there is a union/employment agreement that governs, or this situation has arisen due to some type of discrimination.